Monday, November 14, 2011
My Restless Soul.
Lately my soul has been extra sensitive to the world around me--the pain, the hurt, the desperation. I know that there are so many people out there who are alone and empty. I want to do more! I just don't know what I can do. I feel overwhelmed by all that I should be doing but instead of going out and making a difference, I just drown in the confusion of what my first step should be. I mean, technically I am taking a year off to be "student missionary" but I still feel like I could be doing SO MUCH MORE. My heart has always been for the children of the world--always. Even when I was a child-I just have a place for them. There are so many children who are alone and unloved that I want to reach out and love! I want to travel to all parts of the world and do all that I can. God is coming soon and I am afraid I am not doing my part. I know we can't gain salvation by works but I can't help but feel the need to do more in order to fulfill my purpose on this Earth. I am SO blessed! I feel guilty about having so much when so many have nothing. My heart aches for all those who are cold, on the streets, hungry. I feel a stirring in my body to move and love but I still am motionless. God, please give me the avenues to Your people! Help me to make a difference. I don't want this restlessness to leave me, I don't want to become comfortable. Don't let me become comfortable. Where can I serve!? Give me the energy and the courage to go where You lead me!
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Dearest Eileen, you caught the Jesus' virus. It is contagious and I've had it for a long time. This virus doesn't let you rest in comfort ignoring the needs of others. I gives you hear-ache when you see the suffering of others. And worst of all, it makes you feel like everyone needs to know Jesus. I really hope never to find a cure for it and I hope to pass it on to as many Christians as I can. The only cure that I know will be "getting to heaven." I love you and I love that you love Jesus so much.
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